This is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it! (Psalm 118:24)

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

What grief has taught me about God's capacity to care

Many of you may have seen a couple of "tribute" posts I've made on Facebook recently regarding the the passing of my Uncle Gary.  I'm going to miss him quite a bit.....but my heart breaks for those who are even much more closer to him, particularly his immediate family and most obviously, my Aunt, whom has been near and dear to my heart since she became my pen pal when I was little kid.

I've always had a very empathetic heart that grieves and feels strongly when those I love are hurt in some way.  It impacts my whole self and completely overwhelms me.  That being said, worrying and grieving for my aunt of the loss of her husband has been incredibly difficult these past few days.

The thought struck me.....if I am this overwhelmed and impacted....how does God feel?  I can only imagine how my aunt and my Uncle's children and grandchildren are feeling in these busy days and quiet nights, but God knows very intimately how they feel, how must His heart hurt and He even knows ALL the grief around the entire world.

I often think of God's power in physical form....his ability to heal illness...His creation....but I often don't think of God as an emotional being and since we are created in God's image and because Jesus walked among us...I believe that He knows the emotional limits and intensity of human emotion, and I also believe that HE experiences intense emotions as well. Which makes me go back to that earlier thought....God knows ALL the grief around the world, yet He has to continue doing all of the amazing and wonderful things He does for us each day (whereas my response is to find my favorite blanket and ice cream and create a cocoon for myself on the couch).  This made me realize something I haven't thought of before...God's amazing capacity for emotion....and his amazing capacity to love and support our emotions.

I used to feel guilty about my prayers knowing that there were others out there dealing with harder issues than myself.  How could I pray for God to help me lose weight when there were millions of starving children?  How could I pray for patience with my children when there are millions of children in abusive homes?  And now I realize that I can pray for God's help in my somewhat simple life because he has the capacity to care for ALL of us.  He has the capacity for joy and grief that is immeasurable.  Just as he knows the number of hairs on our heads he knows what's causing our hearts to leap and to break.  And by not praying for what I believe to think is "not something God would care about" is telling God that I don't think He is powerful enough to help me.  I've never thought of that message before that I have been sending God all of these years....and I pray that He forgives me for treating Him in that way.

I think we limit God...I think we try to make Him human.  Where do you limit God's power in your life?