One of my favorite spoken word poets, Sarah Kay, has an assignment to help cure writer's block. That assignment is to write "10 things I know to be true". That list can then lead to a list of "topics" for a writing piece. So. In efforts to cure my writer's block, here's my list.......
1. I have a nomadic spirit. My mind is constantly trying to make sense of my "next step" in life. I have a drive to personally evolve that just can't be squashed. A lot of the time the motivation behind this is because I don't really like feeling content in my career...I feel (right or wrong) that the biggest difference I can make in the world must be just outside my comfort zone. If I'm comfortable with my job, or see that I'm not impacting positive change, I feel the itch to move on and take another risk.
2. I love pre-packaged desserts. Swiss Cake rolls. Those fried cherry pie things are THE best. Cosmic brownies. Fudge rounds. Star Crunch. If it comes in a clear flimsy package, I love it.
3. I have a lot of self-confidence issues with my appearance. I don't like being overweight. I criticize my hair, fashion, etc. I do believe I'm blessed to have a husband that calls me beautiful no matter how I feel about myself. I wish I felt wonderful about my body, no matter how big my curves, but I simply don't. I've tried very hard to think of health over appearance, but I'm not successful in keeping my mind in that direction.
4. I love that my husband is 6'4. I always wanted to marry a tall man and I accomplished that :-)
5. My relationship with God is in desperate need of attention. I do believe that God has been patient with me, but I worry for how much longer He will wait. I never, ever imagined life to be so intense, and I'm ashamed that the one thing that could really make a difference in my life and my family is the one thing that gets pushed to the back of my mind. Thankfully we've found a church in Dubuque that we love, but I know that God is wanting my attention for all of my days, not just Sundays.
6. I mostly only drink 1/2 of my can of pop, but I tend to drink all of a 20 oz bottle. I've recently discovered why that is. Without going into detail, I will share that I've been behaviorally engineered to expect cigarette ashes at the bottom of pop cans, so believe I don't finish pops out of subconscious fear.
7. Even though I know #1 to be true, I have to say that I love, love teaching at the college level. I believe that while I can't promise where I'll be at 30 years from now I would be surprised if I didn't retire from being a professor. Of course I realize that I have no ideas the curve balls that will be tossed in my direction, but I could see myself teaching until I'm 70. With my current student-loan status, that will probably be 5 years too early.
8. I can't grow out my fingernails or my hair. And I've only had a manicure once in my life. Never a pedicure. My feet are gross and I don't wish that experience on anyone.
9. I had an idea at work today that included the term "Jedi". And even though my idea did not go over with any amount of success, I have no regrets. Except for maybe that I did not speak my idea as Yoda did. "Reject my idea you should. Brainstorming out loud again I am."
10. My husband is perhaps the most devoted person that I know. While we don't always see eye to eye and our marriage is not being pitched to Hollywood as the next "Ghost" or "Dirty Dancing" romance, I can't imagine a partner being as devoted to me as he is. He supported me through graduate school, is patient and open-minded with my career path, and was my caretaker for all three back surgeries. When I think about "what might have been" with other men I don't think in romantic wonder, I think in perplexed horror of what might have been if it were not him that I married. That may sound a bit dramatic. But, that's really the bottom line.
So, that's it. That's my 10 things. Whether or not they turn into actual topics is yet to be determined, but it feels great to write again.
